A Little Bit of Give and Take

Luis Perdomo and Iris Pallero are making it in America

by Joe Hawrylko

If there’s one thing that you learn from marriage, it’s that compromises are a way of life. After 16 years together, Irisdania Pallero and Luis Perdomo now know that sacrifices are sometimes necessary.

In 2006, Perdomo, then a supervisor at Mayer Textile, then on Brighton Rd. in Clifton, was presented with a formidable question: relocate with the business or find a new job. “They asked me to move to North Carolina,” he recalled while speaking from the comfort of his living room in his Sears Pl. home. “But it is kind of hard with all of my family that is here.”

His wife’s relatives from her native Dominican Republic were mostly in New Jersey, so uprooting his family would have been difficult. But at the same time, Perdomo knew his job opportunities were limited, since he never got a college degree after immigrating to New Jersey from Colombia in 1986.

Eventually, the couple reached a compromise: Perdomo would work part-time while attending Passaic County Community College to study technology, while Pallero temporarily supported the family as a social worker with the Passaic County Board of Social Services. “That was the idea since the beginning,” explained Perdomo, who said he had intended to go to school earlier. “But I was kidding myself for 20 years. When you start making good money, you forget about school. But at some point in your life, you realize that you need education.”

Now, almost two years later, the 47- year old father of two is on the verge of graduation. Perdomo will receive his associate’s degree in information technology from PCCC this December—something that he most likely could not have done without his wife’s financial and emotional support.

Given her arduous path to America, it’s easy to understand why Pallero was so quick to make sacrifices to help her husband obtain his degree. After all, if Pallero’s mother, Rafaela, had not made her own sacrifices, their family might have remained in the Dominican Republic instead of immigrating to the United States in November 1974.

For the first 10 years of her life, Pallero only knew about her mother from the stories her grandparents would tell her and some old, tattered photographs that were around their small house.

“They just talked about her, because we didn’t have telephone lines,” recalled the 44-year-old “At that time, we used mail a lot.”

Pallero figured that her mother had left Villa Lobos, a little village of just 50 homes in the Dominican Republic, for greener pastures in the United States like so many others had done. It wasn’t until years later when Pallero immigrated to Paterson that she learned of her mother’s true motives.

“She was sending money back to my grandfather to help out,” explained Pallero, who came to the United States when her mother saved up enough money. “We had a very small, wooden house. We eventually built a new house there—that’s where my mom visits.”

Looking back, Pallero added that she really didn’t fully appreciate that sacrifice until she was much older.

“Maybe when I was in my last year of high school, it sunk in,” said the 1983 Paterson Eastside graduate. “Just all the sacrifices she made.”

And even today, Pallero still hasn’t forgotten everything that her mother, Rafaela, did for her. Her mother brought her here, and then pushed her through her teenage years, making sure she had life goals.

“I was the first to graduate from college in my family. It really didn’t sink in for a while,” said Pallero, who attended Rutgers New Brunswick, graduating in 1988 with a bachelor’s in psychology. “My mother always emphasized how important it was.”

However, another motivating factor to go to college was a summer job. “I had a job at a factory with my aunt,” recalled Pallero. “It was tough. Eventually, I said, ‘I can’t take this, it’s not me.’” She also met her future husband in 1988, after they were introduced through a mutual friend. Their paths here were similar. Much like his wife, Perdomo immigrated here with nothing.

“I guess when you’re down there, you really think you can come here and collect dollars off the trees,” said Perdomo, who, in 1986, left his native city of Cali, Colombia to come to Paterson. “But you pay a price—not seeing your family and leaving behind 25 years of your life.”

When he settled in Paterson, Perdomo was an immigrant with skills in hands-on labor and limited English. However, he began studying the language at night classes, eventually beginning to work at Mayer Textile in 1988, a job that Perdomo held until 2006.

“You never know when you’re going to be on the other side of the table,” Iris said of her husband’s unexpected unemployment.

As a social worker for nearly 20 years with the Passaic County Board of Social Services, Pallero regularly deals with individuals who are in similar situations to what her husband faced as an immigrant.

“You also get a lot of people who have been to college and got their Ph.D,” she added. “You never know where you’re going to be.” Born into poverty herself, Pallero is naturally sympathetic to the plight of the less fortunate. “I’m there to help them get rid of the barriers preventing self-sufficiency,” she explained.

Perdomo also believes in helping others and giving back to the community, having coached soccer for nine years with the Clifton Stallions Rec and Traveling leagues.

“At first, it was probably just to make sure my daughters had someone who really knew the game,” explained Perdomo, who played semi-pro soccer in Colombia. “Second, we all have a teacher inside of us. Like I said before, I am happy to be giving back to the society that gave me a lot.”

He believes that what he does keeps kids on the path to success.

“The other day, I saw my daughter (Jazamine) walking down Van Houten Ave. to practice,” said Perdomo, now the Stallions U-10 girls traveling team coach. “She’s doing the right thing and not getting into trouble. I’m proud.”

Karma seems to have rewarded the couple, who now enjoy the benefits of their hard work and sacrifices. They purchased their two-family home on Sears Pl. in Botany Village in 1993, moving from Elmwood Park. “We were looking for a better place to raise a family,” Pallero explained, citing Clifton’s diversity.

And she might not be done yet. With her husband set to graduate, returning to school for an advanced degree is a consideration. “It’s still on my mind,” she said. “I have called Rutgers about it. I want to go for my MSW (Masters in Social Work).” If she does return, Pallero knows her husband will be there to help her pursue her dreams.

However, no matter what she achieves, in Iris’ mind, she wouldn’t have anything if it wasn’t for her mother’s sacrifices back in the 1960s. “If it wasn’t for my mother, God knows where I’d be,” she laughed. “Probably in the Dominican Republic, with three or five or ten kids or something.”